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Lards on Tour


To date there have been several Lards on Tour squash matches. It is hoped that there will be many more. With the strength of the Lards we could even undertake an international tour or three, surely a victorious European one over the likes of Switzerland, Monaco, Luxembourg, etc. Or a South American one over Costa Rica, Bolivia, etc. Or maybe a Canadian state one over BC, Alberta, Saskatewan, etc. With Wales, Lloydy and Feltchy able to act as the respective cultural attaches these are surely all possibilities.

Lards on Tour 200x?

The last proposed tour was scheduled for Manchester 2000 and organised by Roj ( "You didn't get the Olympics, but hey! - You got The Lards!" ), scheduled for first or second week-end in February, there were some key lards who had to pull out and in the end it was postponed to a future unspecified date.

After the successes of the previous LoT's it is now becoming an annual post Xmas event. Also regular are the tour T-shirts, details of current and previous motifs are: Logos


Lards on Tour History

Lards on Tour '99

For various good reasons, there were some no-shows at LoT 99. Most notably Nick Wales would have been playing his first Lard game for sometime if the fog hadn't prevented his flight (surely not too far to swim Iron Lung?). That still left the following playing Lards (Lloyd, Dobbo, Roj, Searlo and Al) and non playing Lardettes (Caroline, Jo, Gill and Pearl). We were joined by some of their team and a great evening was had by all. This is what they had to say afterwards:- Everyone enjoyed themselves Saturday night. Nice crowd ...Say "hi" to all you LARDS!!!!!!

As for us, the most extraordinary sight of the evening was Donkey abandoning strong continental lager in favour of drinking gin and tonics! (I guess we all grow up?) Err...perhaps not, especially the one in their team who drunkenly leered at Caroline and said something like "I love you - you make me come everywhere" (Whatever that might mean!)

As for the squash, the results were:
Canterbury Select - 5.30pm Canterbury SC (3-2)

OK, to be honest Roj was on court last, and at 2-1 and 6-3 down we all thought he'd lost, so he's a hero. He showed inner reserves and I doubt I've seen him play so well.

After the squash we pubbed and curried it (just for a change). On the Sunday Dobbo, Roj, Searlo, Lloydy, Jo and Caroline all met up again and reflected on another successful LoT. - Report by Lloyd

Lard Tour '98

LoT98

Lloyd with some internet help from Roj organised this tour to Nottingham, against a select 5 from Trent bridge and the league team he plays for. There was also a large attendance of non-playing lards and lardettes, who saw the Lards victorious on both nights. Both matches were very close, the score in the first match flattering the Lards as Lloyd (2-0 down) and Roj (7-1 down in 5th) both came back from match points down to win. Dobbo who blew the team out on Friday was the only Lard not to record a win (losing to the player Roj beat the night before!), while Searlo and Al both looked untroubled and are surely on the way up the rankings. In the side event of the 'skirt' match, Gill won the game and the best legs vote, though Royster the Jeremy Beadle award and the beer. - Report by Roj

The playing party was:
Martin Sissons Select - 7.30pm 30/1/98 at Trent Bridge (4-1)

Midweekers - 6.00pm 31/1/98 at Trent Bridge (3-2)

Pictures of the LoT'98 are available in the Image Gallery.

The tour T-shirts details were: Logos

Lard Tour '95

This was against Greenacre squash club in Newbury. A preseason friendly set up by Roj against a work colleague. The opposition proved to strong and prepared for the strongest Lard party yet assembled.
The playing party was:

  1. Old man
  2. Wales
  3. Gavin
  4. Dobbo
  5. Roj

Lard Tour '92

This was to Bishops Storford against Lloydy's home club.
The playing party was:

  1. Lloydy
  2. Nick
  3. Wales
  4. Sam
  5. Dobbo
  6. Roj

Lard Tour '91

This was to London against our only female playing member Sam Simes' club.
The playing party was:

  1. Lloydy
  2. Nick
  3. Wales
  4. Sam
  5. Dobbo

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